Cave Thinking (Lisa)

Sometimes I can be so Elijah, stuck in the dark, dank cave of my mind. In here, I ruminate on the destructive winds of my worries, looking for answers only I can provide. In despair, I spy on the disconnected destruction, as if viewing through an old discarded paper towel tube. Tunnel vision keeps me from seeing the role I am playing in it all. Focusing on MY answers, I struggle on and yet He calls my name. Come to the mountaintop. The Lord is passing by…

The wind, destruction, earthquake, fire, all that damnation does not reach me in my cave but the sound of HIS whisper fills the entire space. God could wreak all that havoc on me and more but instead He chooses to whisper in my human ear. He beckons me to COME. In shameful fear I hide my face, finally seeing my own hand stirring the troubles in my life but owning my mistakes helps me step forward. Standing now, at the mouth of the cave, He asks, “What are you doing Lisa?” What am I doing? What will I do next? What will we do next?

There is a messiah, but we are not Him or HER. We cannot do this alone. We need to go to the mountaintop and shout out our laments with the only One who can console us and sing out in thanksgiving for all that we have and all that we are.

Today, I will begin once again with my morning prayer; Bless us O Lord and these thy gifts which we are about to receive… contemplating all the blessings about to pour down on me. Life is hard AND I am blessed. I do not wish to sit alone with the hard anymore.

1Kings 19:9, 11:13